Chemo Number 7 Completed!

Yes, chemo number seven has been completed.  It was Taxol #3.  The typically appointment goes like this:  I wave at the women at the front desk and head to the chemo suite.  Then, an oncology nurse puts the Power Port gadget on my chest, draws blood, and then I head back to the front waiting room.  

I met with the oncologist today and told him I felt a new lump in my axilla this morning.  Now, I have two.  He said he is very concerned about it.  Tomorrow I go to the hospital to get a CT of my lungs with and without contrast, so my gadgets for the Power Port in my chest so it can be used to put the contrast. Then, on Friday I'm going to have an MRI of my brain.  I've been having headaches again.  And that will be with and without contrast.  

My mind is a scattering of fear and unbelief.  Especially based on my post yesterday - that I've been scared that I may not make it through this.  Cut, paste, and delete.  :)  I'm going to try to go through these three days of tests trying to remain positive and process some of the things Michael and I discussed with the oncologist.  I seem to remember that he said if the chemo didn't work and I have cancer in other areas, that I wouldn't have to do the final treatment.  Michael thought he said they would do it prophylacticaly.  The oncologist said that if it is metastasized to other areas they will look for Phase I and Phase II Clinical Trials.  He mentioned the words "salvage palliative care," and I wrote them down without a full understanding of what it means.  At first I thought it meant they were going to send me home to die, but that's not the case.  I'm still reeling. 

Next, we headed back to the chemo suite.  Michael calls it the "she-mo" suite.  Because I had not received the Neulasta shot last time, my WBC's were lower, but not so low that I could not get chemo today. I was happy for that!  I want to stay strong and get done with all the treatment!  My Dad and Ellen were there during that time and doted on me.  Dad got some photos of me with a new ski cap I got from my friend Lindsey!  It rocks!

So, I received the pre-chemo cocktail and then the nurse started the Taxol infusion.  Within one minute I started having a reaction. I could feel a blue fog in my chest and lungs and it was hard to breathe!!!  I also felt an entire pressure in my head and looked at Ellen and asked her if my head was red and originally it wasn't, and then within in minute or so, it became very red.  My Dad hit the bell and the nurse immediately turned off the Taxol and even used a syringe to get it out of the line in my chest.  My blood pressure, normal at the beginning of my appointment, was up to 144/95 or something alarmingly close to that.  It quickly went down.  They ordered additional Benadryl to infuse into my port and then started it again about 45 minutes later.  I was closely monitored and didn't have another interaction.  Thank goodness!!  With the additional meds in my system, I went right to sleep.  Michael went to do some errands and Dad and Ellen stayed with me.  

So, it ended without any fan fare.  I'm home, now resting, and blogging!  I plan to go to bed early.  I'm anxious about the upcoming tests and pray there is no cancer.  

Done with Sixth Chemo

I had my sixth chemotherapy session on Tuesday.  It was my first session with Michael home.  It was very comforting to have him with me.  We had a brief visit with the P.A. before starting chemo.  We discussed my decision to have an oophorectomy and bi-lateral mastectomy.  I could have the oophorectomy in the 4-6 weeks between chemo and radiation.  There are also some decisions to be made about my bi-lateral mastectomy prior to starting radiation.  She also asked me if chemo has put me into menopause.  That answer is YES.  Perhaps that is why I'm feeling rather depressed and overwhelmed today.  I also talked with her about how excruciating the bone pain was with the last round.  We decided to nix the Neulasta shot this round and see if it helps reduce the pain - and hope my white blood cell counts stay in the healthy range and I don't get sick.  And, it's a good thing we're trying to go without it.  I got the bill for my treatments for the month of September and the price of the Neulasta injection went up from the August billing.  It went from $12,387 to $13,497!!!  Goodness, why in the world would it increase that much in one month?  And, I  got two injections in September.  

Next, we then moved to the chemo suite.  It was my second round of Taxol.  After about 15-20 minutes I had a slight adverse reaction to it.  I was listening to Michael and my friend Carol talking when suddenly I felt a strange sensation in my chest.  It felt like a fog was setting in.  Then, I began to have difficulty breathing.  I waited for about a minute and starting waving at Michael and Carol and asked them to get the nurse.  As I struggled to breathe, she immediately stopped the Taxol infusion and took my blood pressure.  It was high, especially my diastolic pressure.  I just focused on breathing and worked to calm myself down so we could restart the infusion.  We restarted it about 45 minutes later.  Once sure I wasn't going to have any other problems, I took a nap because the combination of Zofran, Ativan, and Benadryl makes me very tired.  We were there for a total of seven hours.  

I'm battling extreme fatigue now.  Some bone pain.  It appears as though my friend "thrush" is making another appearance.  I actually have signs of thrush on my gums, which has been there for about a week.  And, I'm quite depressed.  Maybe it's the doldrums of chemotherapy.  I only have two chemo sessions left.  Then time off to heal and then start radiation.  

I can't help but wonder if the poison being infused into my body every two weeks is killing the cancerous cells?  Will I have a recurrence?  There is a 30% chance it will return in my lungs, liver, or brain.  I hated statistics while working in my master's degree and I don't like these statistics at all.  Being BRCA2+ also increases my chances of other types of cancer.  True to my nature, I have been reading scientific articles that are coming out regarding triple-negative breast cancer and quite frankly, it's upsetting.  I know, many of you think I should quit reading these articles.  But, I'm looking for good news in these articles!  Sifting through them for new treatments or studies that have a glimmer of hope.  

I know a lot of the fight is mental.  A positive attitude.  A will to live.  I certainly have that.  I want to see my son and daughter finish college, get married, and have successful careers.  I want to grow old with Michael.  I want to start running again.  Watch the changing seasons.  Autumn is my favorite season and I feel like I'm missing this fall because I'm always resting and/or sleeping.  

Today is just one of those down days.  It has to be normal for someone living in the shadow of cancer.  

Chemo #5 difficulties

On October 4, 2011, I had my fifth chemotherapy treatment.  It was my first round with Taxol.  I was given the usual pre-chemo cocktail of Emend, Dexamethazone, Zofran, and Ativan.  This time I also received Benadryl and Pepcid to counteract allergic reactions that can happen with Taxol.  The reactions occur not from the Taxol itself, but the liquid the Taxol is suspended in.  I didn't have any reactions - but I did get very looped and groggy from the Benadryl, Zofran, and Ativan combination.  I had several wonderful visitors and finally told Jennifer and Sarah that I needed to drift off in sleep for a while.  We were there a total of six hours!  

I went back 24 hours later and received my Neulasta shot.  Yes, the $12,387 shot.  Fatigue had already set in. Nausea, not so much!  Thank goodness.  I went to an accupuncturist on Thursday to counteract some of the side effects.  My chief complaints were muscle and bone pain.  It was relaxing.  But, that evening, the bone and muscle pain were excruciating.  I was up most of the evening.  I called the cancer center on Friday morning and the oncologist wrote a prescription for a stronger pain med.  Barely able to walk, a friend picked up the script and delivered it to the house.  THANK YOU.  It takes the edge off, but barely.  It honestly feels like my bones are breaking.  My pelvic bones, my femur, tibia, and ankle bones.  I also have severe abdominal pains.  These are all listed as side effects for Taxol and Neulasta.  

Other side effects I'm having are extreme hot flashes and thrush, again.  I would classify the hot flashes more as a volcanic eruption.  My scalp gets SO HOT.  Beads of sweat drip off my head.  I have them during the day and night.  I'm fairly sure I'll have to replace our pillows once I'm done with treatment because they get soaked at night.  And then, freezing cold.  Not much sleeping of late.  

Still struggling, I called the oncologist on-call Saturday and explained the pain I'm experiencing.  He asked my age.  When I told him, he said it's likely my bone marrow is really mounting a strong fight to develop new blood cells and that is what is causing the pain.  He suggested I also take Ibuprofen with the narcotic medication.  

Conor and Olivia have been great.  Conor has made countless trips to the grocery store for me.  Others check on me daily knowing this round has been the hardest of all.  It makes me wonder what the next round will be like.  

Shortage on Chemo Drugs

I mentioned the other day there is a shortage of one of my chemotherapy drugs.  Here is the story from ABC News.

It's a long article, but for someone like myself, who was told Taxol would be part of my treatment plan, it was worth reading, and distressing, to say the least.  There is a video and a long article.  Both are worth watching/reading if you're interested.

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/CancerPreventionAndTreatment/chemo-drug-taxol-shortage-leaves-doctors-scrambling-cancer/story?id=13906891

Still feeling rough.  Very nauseated and fatigued.  A little down.  All a normal part of the process, I'm sure.